Today hasn't been bad. It hasn't been particularily good either. I woke up on time. Watched some Rizzoli and Isles. Was late to pick up Raven. PC and Math were way too easy but what else is new. Choir was exciting. He rearranged the rows so the old back row was in front. Sadly, this made it even harder for Helen and I to hear... German was easy. Lunch was full of laughs and disappointment. Physics we floated our boats. Dakota and Mine failed... Pretty Miserably. Now I am in creative writing. I am excited I actually get to go home after school! Gives me time to finish and probably rewatch some Rizzoli and Isles before conferences...
After the way today is going, I am even more bothered by conferences than usual. I haven't been paying any attention to any of my classes except choir today but I haven't needed to. Iv'e pretty much just lost hope today.
So last night at quizbowl, I answered 22 questions!!! Compared to my max of 5 I was kicking some major nerdy arse! Preston answered 106... I'm still super proud of myself... Now if only a certain other person had actually been there. Then I went to rehersal where I spent the first half hour searching the school for an FBLA logo with Helen (yet missed nothing even though I didn't get to the theater until an hour and a half after practice started...) I was photographed a lot yesterday... it was awkward. We got to leave early! I also mooched a lot of food off of people. I don't reccomend staying at school for over 15 hours straight...
JSA tonight after conferences! That exclaimation point was mostly my last bit of hope. I used to love JSA now stupidity has taken over a majority of the people.
This weekend I plan on killing a lot of things on World of Warcraft. I need my guildies! Iv'e been thinking a lot about Jim Quon lately. He was the Guild Master shortly before I joined the Knights of Good. He had a heart attack and died right before I joined. Everyone loved him so much. Even though I never knew him I know he is a large reason that I am in the guild today. Starre and the other guildies still miss him so much.
I have been talking a lot about how I need to find something that I really love doing but the truth is I have lots of things I love. It's just a matter of what I will do about it. My mom and other adults keep excitedly telling me how close graduation is getting. Some days it takes a lot of willpower to not punch them in the face. I tell people my main reason for fearing the end of high school is that I don't know what to do afterwords and that is part of it but mostly I'm terrified of entering new territory and outliving my older sister. It's just not right. She should be 28 now. The same age as Rowse and several of my other teachers. She wanted to be a special education teacher.
I don't think a lot of my friends realize just how hard it is to see the LIFE class around school. Well, some of them would understand they just don't ever notice when I see them. I have to see several of Lydia's friends everyday and it hurts. I almost lost it at lunch today when I saw the little girl my mom used to take care of. I miss both of my sisters so much. I wish it were easier.
Well, that's all for now.
***Kat***
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